mikegrosshandler.com » Candy

One man’s loss…

mike — Thu, 07 Aug 2008 19:06:44 +0000

That nefarious vending machine seems to have snared another unwitting victim today:

This time, however, the victim was not me!

I’d approached the sweets dispenser looking for something in “chocolate”. Being presented with this scenario, my decision seemed to have been made for me. Milky Way(s) it would be. But how many would I get for my hard-earned dollar? (Those were only $.75 last year, I think… 33% increase in one year, go inflation.)

I girded myself for failure, paid up, and…

Victorious at last!

more candy machine woes

mike — Fri, 25 Jul 2008 20:18:21 +0000

the last time this happened, i wound up spending $3 on 2 twix bars. this time it wasn’t as bad, only $2 for 2 packs of twizzlers, but still. would it kill the candy-machine-stocking people to load the goodies more carefully? or is it more sinister than that? perhaps there’s a training class on maximizing vends. i can see it now…

“Okay class, you’ve done well and you’re almost ready to head out into the world stocking candy machines. But there is one last lesson you must learn.”

The class leans in, eagerly…

The professor continues, “If there is any way to place the candy into the machine in such a manner that one payment won’t allow it to be vended, you must find it. This is imperative.”

somewhere, the candy gods are laughing at me

i wants me candy!

mike — Fri, 29 Feb 2008 22:00:56 +0000

so, i make a point of not buying that much candy. but i do love it. so i just made an exception and gave in to the urge and went to get some twix from a vending machine. mmm twix. so, i paid the $1 (!) for my small bit of chocolaty and caramelly (?) goodness.

the machine spins. my mouth waters in anticipation of sweet sweetness. then, the machine’s forsaken spiral thing Stops spinning, leaving my twix dangling in front of me. teasing me.

i pause. is it worth $2 to get that bar and the next? sure it is. so another hard-earned dollar later, the machine does its thing. my first bar drops, and i wait anxiously for the next to fall. no such luck.

further soul-searching ensues. how far do i take this wicked game? i decide one more dollar, that’s how far.

this evil repeats itself. so now i’ve just paid $3 for 2 twix bars, and some lucky person might or might not get a free bar later today. i’m betting they won’t, though. i knew i should have gotten swedish fish.